Forever and a day

It's been forever and a day since I posted.

And now I'm sitting in the Denver airport with five minutes to go until boarding. The Bachelor (the women tell all episode) would not cooperate with me, and I figured now is as good a time as any to try to regain some of my lost blogging dignity.

I've been thinking a lot about family, lately. I'll be seeing cousins I haven't seen in years. The cousins I'm actually closest in age to on my mom's side. They are also, incidentally, the cousins I live closest to. It bothers me that we never see each other, although we live within 20 minutes of each other. But yet, here we are (or will be soon), all together again to celebrate a wonderful life that has passed. And when I sit and think about it, the last time I saw my cousins was to celebrate a different life.

Why is it that we can't seem to manage to make time for each other until someone passes away? Part of me thinks it's just downright stupid. (That's one of my words of the week. That and damn.) I mean, seriously. We don't even make it to see each other at Thanksgiving or Christmas. It's only when someone dies that we drop everything and hop on planes to be with each other. To console each other. But I've been stirring this around in my head for a few days now, and I've decided I'm okay with that. If we only see each other once every few years, at least it's during a time when we really need each other. At least it's during a time we've all set aside to celebrate life. I don't know what it all means, and I know that as much as I keep saying "celebrate" I really mean mourn. Because that's the kind of person I am.

But at least this is an opportunity for reconciliation. Nothing makes you put your life and your relationships in perspective like death. I refuse to let petty nothings come in between my family and I. I know that this isn't going to change anything and that it'll probably be another few years before we all see each other, but this is a step forward for us all.

I really don't know what I just wrote. I hope it makes sense. Time to board. Wish me luck, loves. 

Things I'm Thankful For:

I told ya' I couldn't promise the post by Friday, didn't I!

So here goes:

I'm thankful for my actual Thanksgiving Day--I'm grateful that I got to meet my boyfriend's extended family and learn a little bit more about where he comes from and why he's so awesome. They were so incredibly welcoming--I spent the morning running commentary of the Macy's Day parade with the boy, his dad, and his uncle. I felt like a part of the family within the first five minutes, literally. That's never happened before. I'm also grateful that our families are close enough that I got to see my family on Turkey Day as well. Even though only 7 of us showed up, I'm grateful for conversation that we had--we've never had that random combination of relatives before, and it was perfect. I got to see my closest cousin for the first time in 8 months, and we had one of those rare awesome heart-to-hearts that I love so much. I'm thankful for the family that didn't show up--I missed them, and I realized how crucial every member of my family is--we are really a family--made up of individual units that can't be taken away or replaced.

I'm thankful for cooperating weather and the safe travels everyone made. Though I complain about the lack of snow, I was grateful that this Thanksgiving holiday, the dry roads made for safer driving.

I'm thankful for my education. The break away from school was more than necessary, but coming back has made me realize 2 things: 1) I'm going to miss this place. I'm going to miss the people, the classes, my professors, and the community. This school has been my home, and I love it to pieces, and it's a bittersweet feeling knowing that it's all coming to an end in a few months. 2) I'm so lucky to be where I am, and I've had opportunities some people never get the chance to have. I realized even more this holiday how much my parents have encouraged learning and how lucky I am that they did.

I'm thankful for people that believe in me. My parents, friends and the boy are always there to give me pep talks when I need it--or just a hug. I know I've been driving everyone crazy lately being stressed about post-college plans, but I'm SO thankful that I have people that love me enough to put up with that and to listen. Thank you guys.

I don't know how in the world I'm lucky enough to have the people I have in my life, but I'm so blessed. Happy Thanksgiving to you all. :)

xoxo